Saturday, 22 May 2010
It is your idea that you have to do things that entangle you in results of your efforts-the motive, the desire, the failure to achieve, the sense of frustration-all this holds you back. Simply look at whatever happens and know that you are beyond it. p.148
You give reality to concepts, while concepts are distortions of reality. Abandon all conceptualisation and stay silent and attentive. Be earnest about it and all will be well with you. p.154
Nothing is done by me, everything just happens. I do not expect, I do not plan, I just watch events happening, knowing them to be unreal. p.191
All will happen by itself. You need not do anything, only don't prevent it. p.242
If you just try to keep quiet, all will come - the work, the strength for work, the right motive. Must you know everything beforehand? Don't be anxious about your future - be quiet now and all will fall into place. p.248
Be empty of all mental content, of all imagination and effort, and the very absence of obstacles will cause reality to rush in. p.260
Deepen and broaden your awareness of yourself and all the blessings will flow. You need not seek anything, all will come to you most naturally and effortlessly. p.261
The very notion of doership, of being a cause, is bondage. p.298
In the light of calm and steady self-awareness inner energies wake up and work miracles without any effort on your part. p.311
Just turn away from all that occupies the mind; do whatever work you have to complete, but avoid new obligations; keep empty, keep available, resist not what comes uninvited. p.375
Extracts from the amazing...
Friday, 21 May 2010
Advaita is about non-duality, or what I like to call these days, Oneness. The idea is that all there is in the Universe, is Oneness. All is part of the bigger whole. Nothing is separate - anything that looks separate, is just that, a look. It's still part of a bigger whole, or One. There is nothing at all, no matter how good or evil, that is apart from the One.
Now the tricky and exciting bit. The One, the whole, is responsible for everything that happens, including you and everything you do. You are not separate from the One. You are part of One. Every decision, action, thought, feeling, desire you have is actually "One's" responsibility. You don't do anything. Appearing to do something, is actually Oneness appearing to do something.
So all there is, is Oneness. It's an idea that makes sense to 'me'.
:) May you be well.
By the way, this is my new book coming out in July. I've included some nonduality in it too! :)
Saturday, 15 May 2010
When we talk about "free will" we are talking about individual or personal will, and there is no individual or person...so there is no free will. But there is One Will, there is the burst of aliveness everywhere in the eternal now. And it's great to be part of that, and sometimes that One Will may feel like individual, personal will- like when we are caught up in some creative enthusiasm- and that's fine- it doesn't really matter whether we call it free will or not- we just ride the magic carpet ride whatever we call it. And lots of times it's not much fun, and that's okay too. "Feel like a separate person? That's perfect." How unbounded...Breaking down the walls of "should" and "shouldn't" or the walls of "spiritually correct" and "spiritually incorrect" in the mind.
Thank you Colleen :)
People get hung up on finding meaning in their lives, discussing and thinking endlessly about whether God exists, what is the nature of reality, or if they should get married, have children and so on. However the greatest mystery is sitting right under their noses. The very fact that the Universe exists at all is the greatest mystery of all, surely.
Ultimately, all is well just as it is. You may not see the glorious fact that you're actually alive, whatever 'you' is, but is that your fault? No. I don't think so. Thoughts come and go, feelings come and go, decisions and choices come and go. All happens by itself, even though there is, and quite naturally, a strong sense of individuality.
Sometimes I find life really tough, and so called difficult decisions need to be made. However, I am fortunate to see that I didn't really make the decision and so don't feel too guilty or stressed about the choice.
You're perfect just as you are, whether you're seeking or not. All is Oneness is operation, just as she is. Right now, oneness is looking at herself. No claim, no fame, no blame.
Sunday, 9 May 2010
2. Your physical body cannot exist for even one second without the environment around it. Take away air, and you're finished. Take away space and you're no longer there. Take away everything your senses detect, and you're as good as dead.
3. If you were separate from onenenss, that would mean that the oneness isn't oneness! The very fact that oneness exists, would mean it includes everything.
4. Oneness couldn't be something to be attained. For what would you experience if you got oneness? All experience imply a duality of experiencer and experience. You can only experience the world through duality. The duality comes from the onenenss, and is perfect just as it is.
BONUS REASON!!! :)
5. Oneness couldn't be attained in the future, because the future never comes. You always have been and always will be in the present moment. So this moment now, is onenness. This is it. You have arrived and always have arrived.
Tuesday, 4 May 2010
Questions such as these imply someone who is searching, and someone else who needs to be found. So, it doesn't make sense. How can you discover yourself, if you are yourself? You're chasing your tail. Even to say you need to be yourself implies that you are something else. But how can you ever be something else? You always are yourself! Be as you are - you honestly are fine just as you are. And you're fine if you're not happy the way you are and want to change, as that's part of what you are too.
So, to discover your true self, you don't need to do anything. Self discovery isn't about some great big flash of enlightenment - that's just a passing experience. All these teachers that say they've 'got it' have had an experience and are holding onto that past experience, and keep repeating an insight they had. And that's fine - that's what's happening. For me, I see that search and not searching are both perfectly beautiful aspects of creation, of oneness. It's all happening perfectly, just as it is. And not agreeing with this, and being a guru teaching a path to truth is also part of oneness too. It's all oneness in operation, dancing its dance.
Keep dancing your dancing - you're wonderful, just as you are. Sorry about the overplayed song below - couldn't help it :)
Sunday, 2 May 2010
Now, I'm thinking about getting the ipad from Amazon when it's available in the UK. Is it worth it?
Tuesday, 27 April 2010
You are ultimately not the thoughts, emotion or body - you are that which is aware of it.
You are beyond all experience, being the experiencer.
Ultimately, you are not the experiencer either, as there is no experience without an experiencer.
You are awareness, experiencing whatever is popping up for you.
You are THAT.
You don't need to understand anything. You are already awareness and so are totally free, just as you are. Just relax and enjoy.
This is a good book - let me know if you're read it.
Saturday, 24 April 2010
There is no central decision maker.
Even though you know there is no free will, you still struggle with decisions. That's okay.
If you wipe all your memories, who are you.
Not understanding this is not in your hands.
You don't exist.
Right now, the universe is looking at itself.
Time and space are illusions like in a dream.
Keep living as you've always lived, if you want. Its perfect.
Searching and not searching are both done by the universe herself.
Love is just an emotional attachment that comes and goes from time to time.
All there is, is love.
These are just lines on a screen. You don't need to understand lines on a screen.
I'm talking complete nonsense. I'm just saying what's popping in my head. I have no other option, until I stop.
You've never done anything in your entire life.
You are the universe.
Feeling confused? Trying to get rid of confusion? Why? What's wrong with being confused? Confusion and non-confusion are both creations of the universe and perfect just as they are.
Everything's perfect including the desire to change the world and try to get justice and end poverty and reduce child labour.
Have you ever done somthing wrong? Could you help it? What if all 'wrong' actions were by people who couldn't help it?
Feel like a separate person? That's perfect.
Feel crap? It'll pass
Feel good? It'll pass
Feel oneness? It'll pass
Feel like everything will pass? It'll pass
You are Awareness.
Why are you still reading this? Because you don't have a choice.
You're a robot that thinks its in charge.
If you think you're free, you're free.
If you think you've got money problems, you've got money problems.
If you think you're okay the way you are, you're okay.
Animals don't need to improve do they? They wake up, eat when they're hungry, sleep when they're tired. The same happens to you. As a human you're a product of nature. A marvellous creation of nature in her intelligence. Nature has given humans consciousness, thought, feelings and actions. You are nature in operation.
Friday, 23 April 2010
For example, your partner says you never do the shopping and you say you do lots of other things she doesn't do, and an argument starts. You say things that aren't very nice, and so does she. Or you both stop talking altogether. You may go on to feel guity, frustrated, think you're not good enough, go on a personal development class etc. I'm not saying this is good or bad - it's just what may happen.
So, what's going on from an Advaita point of view? Well, whatever your partner is saying is not her fault. Thoughts are coming to her head, and she is saying them. It's not a matter of whether they are true or not - it's just that those thoughts are coming to her head. So, seeing this, you can't really blame her for her reaction. Secondly, whatever you think, say or do is not your fault either. Those thoughts came to your head at the time and the reaction happened. You can't really blame yourself for it, because you didn't do it. So, understanding this, guilt goes out of the window too.
Ultimately, all there is, is Oneness.
The sun is shining here in Kingston, and as I write in Starbucks, the Beatles song Across the Universe plays out. Here it is -I love the lyrics.
Go well, and thanks so much for reading :)
Thursday, 22 April 2010
1. Are you always aware of the sense of I?
No, of course not. It disappears in sleep and also when you're engaged in a task, the sense of I is forgotten.
2. Who is aware of the sense of I?
As you are aware of the sense of I, you can be the sense of I itself. For example, you can see your computer so you're not your computer. You can see your body so you're not your body. You can see your thoughts, so you're not your thoughts. And you can see the sense of I, so you're not the sense of I. You can never be that which you are aware of, you must be that which is aware of it.
So, hopefully you can see that the sense of I am is actually just a thought which has a feeling associated with it, as thoughts do, which kind of pops into and out of your consciousness. So, then the question is, what are you or who are you? Well, actually, nobody knows, because as soon as you experience who you are, that is just an experience, it's not who you are. The important point is that you know that you are not this passing thought/feeling which is 'I'. That's just a thought, like 'banana' or 'laptop'. Just a word.
Being in this state of not knowing, is it. Now, if someone calls you an idiot, and you call them an idiot back, that's just thoughts operating. They didn't mean to do it, they just had that thought pop into their head, and you didn't mean to react, it just happened. Everything just happens...
So, you are free. You always have been free actually. Just that the brain believed very strongly in the thought 'I am' and not it doesn't believe it quite so much. And even if it does believe it, that's okay - that's just the way the brain is at the moment.
Everything is operating according to the energy and laws of physics in the Universe. So called 'you' are part of that too. It's all unfolding automatically, including the feeling that you are a separate person and need to understand this stuff. This is all part of the energy of the universe doing it's thing. It's all a beautiful mystery and nobody understands it, and that's the beauty of life.
Have a nice rest of the day, or night. Best wishes to you.
Wednesday, 21 April 2010
Advaita is not about feeling good all the time, blissed out in oneness. Advaita is to continue living your life as before but knowing it's not the ultimate reality. Advaita is being exactly as you are at the moment. Ultimately, all is well. Relatively, it appears all is not well.
Seeing things from the Universe's point of view helps slot life into perspective.
Tuesday, 20 April 2010
If choice and responsibility don't exist you're free. If you think they do exist, you live with a burden. However you don't even have a choice about what you believe, so it doesn't matter!
Seeking and finding - its already all perfect.
Sunday, 18 April 2010
1. Clear your mind of your past ideas
Just forget about all your past ideas about who you are and where you live and your name and your family and all that other stuff that's in your head. Just forget the whole thing - let's start with a blank slate. What do you mean you can't clear it? Okay, if you can't clear, just pretend you can - that'll do. It's not too important. :)
2. Understand that the whole Universe and everything else is all One big blob
The whole thing is one thing. You just need to understand this in your head really. It's one thing, isn't it. That's why it's called Uni-verse. One. Now, don't start going on about multiple Universes...just accept that everything that exists...everything...is part of the whole Oneness blog thingy. Oh yea, and that includes you too. You're also part of the whole blob.
3. Understand that the Universe is running the whole thing, including you, baby. Yes YOU.
If the Universe is everything, and everything inside the Universe is part of the Universe, then you are also a bit of the Universe. And so, being a bit of the Universe, everything that you do, is actually the Universe doing it. Yea, I know, that's pretty crazy, but it's true isn't it? You, whatever you means, is part of the Universe blob isn't it? Am I making any sense people? Am I talking to myself? I hope not....
4. You are the One, Neo (I stole that line from that awesome filum, the Matrix)
So.....you are one with the universe and everything else. You're like a wave in the ocean. You're part of the whole thing, doing your thing. Everything is just happening. Including you reading this, understanding or not understanding, EVERY FRIGIN THING is just what is. GET IT? And if you don't get, don't worry about it, nobody get it really, they're all just pretending. You cool just the way you are buddy....just the way you are.
Sorry about the chilled out talking style today. I don't know what's happening.....I think that hot curry last night has screwed me up somehow. :)
Friday, 16 April 2010
You are doing exactly as your thoughts are telling you to do.
That's all you can do and it's 100% perfect as it is. Wanting to improve is part of the perfection.
If you can't see that you're perfect at the moment, that's perfect too!
Everything, and I mean everything, happens according to Beingness/Consciousness/Awareness/Spirit/God/Oneness/Truth/Reality/Energy/Universe.
All is That, including you.
Not understanding that is not your fault, it's That not understanding, and....you guessed it.....PERFECTOS!
1. I have no choice. I didn't decide what thoughts would come to my head to distract me and whether I would be in a calm mind or not.
2. I never do anything anyway. Thoughts arise and actions happen. There's no Shamash actually doing anything. That's an idea that comes and goes.
3. What's wrong with right now, if I don't think about it.....nothing! That's a great sentence to bring to mind.
4. All there is, is That. I use the word That to mean oneness, awareness, god, spirit whatever you want. But That which is everything, is all that exists. The sense of separation comes from that oneness. And the separation is just temporary, like a wave in an ocean. So, does it really matter how efficient you are, knowing this?
5. Efficiency is just an idea, not a fact This is all just thoughts. You may think you were inefficient, whereas someone else may think you've done so much. Efficiency is just a relative concept, with no absolute reality underlying it.
Hopefully, I'll be more efficient tomorrow :)
Thursday, 15 April 2010
I find Advaita very therapeutic most of the time. I'm talking about pure 100% Advaita, like pure 100% freshly squeezed orange juice. Advaita meaning not two. So, you are not separate from anything else at the moment - you don't need to become free or even realise freedom, as you're already freedom - that kinda Advaita.
I suppose before understanding the whole Advaita thing, everything was quite serious. I would have a tendency to blame myself if something went wrong - now, I'm not too bother generally, as it's not my fault. I had a tendency to lock in my emotions, and it's not good to be angry. Now I love being angry! That's a big change for 'me'. Oh yes, and searching...before I had the idea that I need to search for something, I need to get it. Now I don't care if I'm searching or not - I see it all as oneness. Oh yes, yes, another point. Wow, I'm on a roll this morning. I don't have to go round being 'good'. That's a huge one, and a great relief to let go. I may be nice and do so called good things, but I don't push myself towards such actions at all. Once you see that actually you don't have choice, everything is just f***ing happening, then where does good and bad come into the equation. Without choice, there's no good or bad really - there's just what's happening.
Have a lovely day people!
Both search and not searching are both oneness. Oneness includes everything, otherwise it wouldn't be oneness. So, no matter what happens, or what you apprarently do, it's all oneness in action
What about practising to achieve enlightenment - is that possible?
Enlightenment cannot be an experience or state of mind to be gain, as it would be lost again. I think enlightenment just means understanding - but then again, that's just the thought that popped into my mind. How do I know? How does anyone know?
How can I get peace of mind
Whether your mind is at peace or not is not your choice. You don't control thoughts ultimately. Seeing this, you may let go of judging your thoughts. This may lead to a sense of peace, but there's no control in the situation - just an imagined control. So, there is no future peace of mind, there is only now. How's your mind now is all there is.
Last week there was the sense that I was searching for something. I had read on a website somewhere that the search comes to an end when there is no longer suffering. So, I had began searching for the right answer, the right quote, the right teacher that could stop suffering. Then, I finally thought 'Forger this. This is it'....I typed 'this is it' in google and found the right website for my questions....
Here's some pointers that come to mind
What happens, is oneness happening already.
Whether you're seeking or not, it's not your choice. So you're totally free.
Annoyance, irritation, suffering. It's all just arising in the the here and now and perfect just as it is.
It's not that God is somewhere. It's that God is everywhere.
No matter how hard you try at not being one, you are still oneness
There is nothing good or bad, but thinking makes it so.
No matter how badly your life is going, you're not doing it anyway.
You've never made a single choice.
Life unfolds as it unfolds, including your desire to change it.
Seeking and not seeking are both happening and choiceless and perfect.
Everything that is, is full of the Lord. Claim nothing; enjoy. Do not covet Her property.
Sunday, 11 April 2010
"It’s not that there’s no God
It’s that there’s only God"
I normally don't even think about God, but found this sentence to be absolutely true. Here are some more wonderful lines!
You are totally free
Because there’s nothing you can do
It's not you that's being you
It's life that's being you
The I is nothing special
And therefore has the same free will
As a rock
You are absolutely free
You just can’t know it
It’s not that
“There’s no-one to be enlightened
So don’t bother”
It’s that there’s no-one
To not be enlightened right now
Liberation is not done by you
It would be done by oneness
If it weren’t the case already
Concepts always succeed to fail
What a brilliant set of pointers! Hope you enjoyed them too :)
Saturday, 10 April 2010
"Life will be perfect when _____ happens." - this is a thought story. Peace is here and now and nowhere else.
I am nothing and no one, nor are you. I don't have special knowledge or grace. I am not an authority of any sort. I am.
You cannot kill the ego. Try to smite the air with a stone and you will hit nothing.
Search into the endless universe and you will still be it. You cannot find that which was never missing.
If I was not, no experence could arise.
The thought “I am” is not what I am.
I am that which is prior to thought, which is it’s precondition.
I have never been limited, no borders impinge on me.
In my clarity, impressions and thoughts arise.
Some of these thoughts pretend to describe me.
Other thoughts reference these images.
Being is never sullied by appearances.
Our nature is freedom, we only suffer in thought.
In reality, oneness is all that ever appears.
There isn’t anyone who “gets this” and “doesn’t get it”.
There is only this.
Thoughts of confusion and separation will pass and this will still be.
Thoughts couldn’t appear without this.
In spiritual circles, the idea of "awakening" is usually seen as a big deal - "Ooooh - he's awakened!" but, in reality, NOTHING can appear to happen without wakefulness/awareness.
Thanks to Morgan's site for these pointers :)
Friday, 9 April 2010
What is the sense or feeling of 'I am'? You can't be that feeling, because You are aware of it. Also, since the feeling of I am comes and goes, you cannot be it or you'd be disappearing and reappearing all the time.
You have no location. The sense of being in your body is a concept that arises in You. Where is Awareness located? Is it not everywhere? ALL experience is in and as Awareness. There's no I in Awareness. The sense of being an observer and the sense of observed are both experiences in the non-conceptual Awareness that you are.
The sense of I am does not disappear. However, the sense of identity with that concept gets annihilated.
As I sit here I become aware of the thought feeling 'I am'. I'm not trying to get rid of it. I look at the sense with love and warmth. I notice the desire for some future freedom and let it go knowing that there is only now. There is still a hope for a future freedom, I notice. So I see that I am awareness and always have been and always will be. I connect with that. I recall that awareness is impersonal and let it operate effortlessly.
Any effort to try and eliminate the centre perpetuates it. Anything I do is by the centre. So there is nothing I can do about it. That's freedom right there.
Let go of all effort to be realised and enjoy the show of awareness.
Wednesday, 7 April 2010
Absolute freedom is right now.
Who is here to practice something?
There is no special moment for you to get something as there's nothing to get!
Longing for freedom in the future implies you don't have it.
I'm not a teacher and you're not gonna get anything from me.
That freedom is priceless, valuable and possible.
This approach starts with freedom.
You don't need to wait for an energetic shift.
There's nobody out there that's defective.
I am not awakened yet is an I thought that causes suffering. All 'I' thoughts cause suffering. I is the source of problem.
Ask 'What is the nature of who I am?'
Start from the fact that you're already That.
Your being is That.
There's no experience that you need to get in the future.
Can you recognise the fact of your being right now?
Your own presence is beyond all doubt. You are That.
This is right here and right now. Let the interest be in that. Be clear about that. It perfectly whole and complete and doesn't need awakening or enlightenment.
You already are what you are.
In this moment now there is not a thing wrong.
Your being doesn't need enlightenment. You already are that. You don't need that concept to be free. No more seeking is needed.
Your being is right here. You can't get being from book guru etc. The menu is not the meal. Ask what is undeniably here right now?
Seeking is conceptual as long as the I is believed. It ends when you see right now the fact of your own being is That.
It's not about experiences.
Your being is not your body or any experience.
Be clear about the fact of your own being.
Tuesday, 6 April 2010
So, who are you? You use your body but aren't actually your body. You're aware of your thoughts but aren't your thoughts themselves. You're aware of your feelings but aren't your feelings. Right now who are you? Reading is happening and if you are fully engaged in the reading, there is no sense of being here. All there is, is observing. The thought 'I am looking' obviously isn't doing any looking. All happens without the need for an 'I'. Does your intuition tell you it could be true?
The I thought is the source of all suffering if believed to be true. I need to xxxx I must xxxx I should xxxx what shall I do. I hate xxxx I love xxxx. If these thoughts are fine if they're not seen as reality but just thoughts dancing like waves in the sea. Does this all sound plausible?
Monday, 5 April 2010
In the same way, you are awareness, beingness, truth, presence but you think you are a separate individual. You don't need to become awareness because you already are awareness. You just think you're a separate individual - that's the only issue. Notice that being or awareness is effortless and ever shining. Even when dreaming, the dream is lit up by awareness.
Right here and now, get a sense of being. Be here, now. Notice your own presence. Notice awareness happening. See how everything is present as awareness is present. Remember you are awareness - you don't need to become it.
Let go of any ideas of being a separate individual. Allow yourself to be yourself as being. Let go of any ideas about realising this in some future wonderful event and relax into being right now. Be as you are. Nothing but yourself. Notice being is at peace all the time. Being is ever present. Being is whole and beyond separation. Separation is just a thought, an idea. Being is free, and beyond ideas of separation and unity. That's it. You are being. Just be.
Warm wishes from being to being. :-)
Saturday, 3 April 2010
Right now, I'm sitting on a very comfortable chair in a warm, slightly humid morning overlooking a green lush lawn, with a lake in the distance. I’ll post a picture up if I remember. :) I’ve spent the last 15 minutes or so in choiceless awareness. I sat and found myself looking at the beautiful scenery, listening to the birds, the sound of a closing door and the footsteps of other people. Every now and then, thoughts came up about a variety of different things, I can’t even remember what, and then went back into the sights and sounds around.
When the desire to control attention ceases, relaxation arises more naturally. Meditation is often considered to be a controlled attention, a deliberate focus of awareness onto a chosen experience. You can only be naturally yourself in choiceless awareness, when you are not trying to gain something from your life. The constant desire to improve, to be better, to be healthier becomes a burden, stifling the very life that you wanted to improve. The desire for happiness can be the greatest burden, with the constant questioning ‘am I happy?’. Once you begin to appreciate that you are not the controller, there is no central entity that consciously makes decisions, but thought naturally springs up and creates action, you are no longer responsible is the usual sense of the word. You can sit back and watch the show.
Sometimes I feel annoyed and tired. Sometimes I feel happy and very much alive. That's life.
Life seems to be a combination of fluxing pleasant and unpleasant experiences. Following a pleasant sensation grows the urge to repeat the event. For example, the desire to drive through attractive scenery. The question is, who wants to re-experience? You may say 'I' but that is just a letter. With an understanding that the individual self is a construct of thought, the craving for the pleasant and aversion of the unpleasant reduces. The person that appears to exist is awareness, and awareness simply lights up experience and is indifferent. Awareness is experience. You are experience. You are the world and the sense of being an individual - relax, you are perfect exactly as you are.
The temperature hits 42C outside as we meander down the hill side. The sun creates a shiny mirage near the horizon.
Friday, 2 April 2010
As I am awareness, I am everything. I am the sound of the fan, the warmth of the body and the reflection of the pale, silver moon on the lake outside. I am all people and all places. I am the feeling 'I've got it' and the feeling 'I don't understand'. I am the sense of doubt and frustration, and the pangs of hunger. Bondage and liberation are both experiences in me. The twinkly stars and wispy clouds and sense of distance and separation are none other than reflections of experience in me. Any effort I make to try and be one with everything, to attain some special feeling is a desire that comes and goes in the magical, mystical, ordinary and extraordinary awareness that I am.
I feel the desire for breakfast. I notice a wave my fatigue along with another mosquito bite on my thigh. I toss and turn to no avail - sleep has gone walkies. Thoughts about what I'll be doing today come to mind.
All apparent responsibility is illusory. Thoughts arise, desires surface and activity happens. This whole blog is clearly just automatic thoughts. With responsibility comes the idea 'I've got to xxx' which creates unnecessary stress. Seeing there is no doer, actions become spontaneous and aren't judged as good or bad. Is a puddle bad for being muddy? Is the sun good for being shiny?
The end of choice is the beginning of freedom. Claim nothing; enjoy.
Thursday, 1 April 2010
Spirituality is essentially about discovering oneself. So discovering is required rather than an experience. Now can YOU understand YOURself? You are yourself! So being already yourself, you cannot see or experience you. Anything you experience is NOT you. The closest you can get is a sense of beingness or 'I am ness'.
You are already that which you seek. Just be yourself. Be as you are.
Wednesday, 24 March 2010
However, if you are courageous enough to look closely, are you in control? Do you know what you're going to think next? If you don't, surely it is fairly obvious that it is thoughts that lead to decisions being made. And it is decisions that lead to action being taken. So, the fact that thoughts just seem to pop up and decisions are taken means that you are not in control.
Although you may feel uneasy about your seemingly lack of control, if you stay with this notion, the outcome is interesting. You have never made any choices in the past either - so all the feelings of guilt, pride, blame all go out of the window - you weren't responsible for those actions. This doesn't mean you can go round harming people or worse - your conditioning will prevent you, as well as the thought of the consequences of those actions.
So, letting go of control leads to freedom. Now you see that thoughts are leading to decisions and actions, and you are doing nothing about the whole thing. The whole of 'your life' is just happening. Surely there is a great freedom in that. Seeing how little you control is a bit like children who move the steering wheel on one of those computer game machines, without putting the money in. The car is moving around the race track whether the child moves the steering wheel or not.
Letting go is not easy. But if you look carefully at all that's being said, you cannot help but let go. The human brain is so complex, the thoughts have created the sense of an individual in each human. Then this individual asserts control, responsibility, choice, action.
All is happening perfectly just as it is. The universe is simply 'unversiing'. You are simply now at the natural stage of questioning your own sense of ego or individual existence, as am I. This is not something that happens once and bang. This is an ongoing unfolding process that takes place, moment by moment. For me, each day there is a sense of individuality. Underneath that, there is a sense of beingness, aliveness or awareness.
See the whole thing as a game. Don't take things too seriously. Young children who are lucky enough to be brought up securely just play and play - it's natural when the individual is not taken seriously for playing to happen. May you be well.
Monday, 22 March 2010
The feeling is a mixture of confusion and anxiety, due to a current concern I have in the story. I'm not sure what I'm going to decide in the next few days, which will impact on my life, and so I am living with uncertainty. I can feel this feeling in my body. There is a slight tingling in my stomach and a lethargy in my body as a whole. As I listen to the thoughts in my mind, I am aware of total silence. Some judgements come up about this, and debate as to whether a silent mind is good, bad or neutral. I think about how I could come to a decision sooner so that I don't have to endure this moment by moment pain. I think of an idea and then let it go for now. I hear the sound of a bird this morning, reminding me to be alive to the nature around me. Silence again. My stomach isn't so painful anymore.
I reflect on the fact that all these experiences are only existing because of awareness. Without awareness, none of this would be happening. I step back and back, step back into the awareness that I am, whatever that means for me. I notice my hand rises to scratch my chest, but I didn't do the scratching or the decision to scratch. I notice the hands are punching away at this keyboard - I'm not doing the typing. I notice hunger is arising in my stomach - I'm not hungering - it is just happening. I notice that I am breathing in and out quite naturally throughout this conversation - just happening. I reflect on the fact that this so called big decision will happen by itself too. This follows up with a wave of fear, a desire to control, an anxiety that the 'wrong' decision could be made. All this is what is happening in and as awareness.
I am awareness. Awareness is another name for me. I am the silent witness, the observer, pure beingness. I am totally free now, and always have been. Pain and pleasure, loss and gain, right and wrong are the pairs of opposites that flow through the beingness that I am. I have never done anything, nor will I ever do anything. Desire and action operate through the body mind whilst I watch the show. All the world is in my mind, a set of thought concepts, like a dream. I play the part of an individual, not as a reality, but as a play. This whole thing that's happening is a wonderful play. There is no need to take anything too seriously - after all, it is all only awareness in a different disguise.
Sunday, 21 March 2010
If you think of yourself as the body-mind organism only, you certainly do need to make efforts. The body exerts itself to achieve outcomes, right from the moment you get out of bed, to the time to crawl back into bed. And then, some people even try to put effort into falling asleep, although this, of course, can never work.
However, if you consider yourself as awareness, beingness, or that which you cannot observe, the witness, you never make any effort to do anything. Effort arises and passing in awareness, in the mind, but you don't do the effort.
Walking in nature can be a wonderful way of observing your bodymind do its effortless wondering around. The process can be very nourishing. I spend half an hour yesterday, pottering around in a local park, and was fascinated by how my bodymind moved around and reacted to the deers, the pond, dogs and other people.
Watching yourself is just as fun as watching other people when you're sitting in a cafe. Once you stop thinking of the bodymind as an object to be judged, you can relax and watch the bodymind operate naturally from moment to moment.
'oh no, monday morning' the thought in awareness arises for some.
but is it true, can a day be labelled as such?
there was a time when monday existed not.
fingers on the keyboard, an itch, the sound of a distant plane humming,
surely this is what is, not monday, not the world, not the thoughts about another day.
the mind wonders freely, awareness rooted in the real.
there's freedom now, to go where I will,
no rules, no judgment, no conflict that's deep.
the crisp morning air calls and draws my body out,
life continues to unfold, the great mystery from beyond.
alive, awake, here now forever more.
Saturday, 20 March 2010
I am going to show you a radically different way to how you would be advised from your average self-help guru or psychologist - but it 'works'.
1. Recognise the emotion is not your fault. Emotions arise from a combination of thoughts, actions, genes, the food you eat, the people around you - there are many different factors involved. Emotions are always arising and passing away, and there are always sad and happy emotions coming and going. The emotions are not controlled by you at all. You have no choice as to what emotion comes up in your awareness. If confusion is popping up in your awareness, confusion is popping up - that's your experience. Understand as deeply as you can, that emotions are not your fault. Emotions are neither good or bad idea. Emotions just exist, like the air around you just exists. It's the way things are.
2. Observe what action arises. Just watch and see what happens. Maybe if you're feeling angry you may answer back to your partner, or walk out, or shout or whatever. Perhaps you'll just feel the emotion and see what happens next. Maybe nothing happens. No matter what happens, it doesn't really matter. Again, it is not your fault or responsibility. The emotion may create an action or may not - that's what emotions do. You don't need to control it because you don't control anything ultimately. Thoughts pop up, emotions pop up, and actions happen. Your action or inaction is neither good or bad - it is what it is.
3. That's it. You don't need to do anything else. The emotion will pass away like all emotions. Remember, you are not the thoughts or emotions or bodily sensations. You are the awareness that is aware of this all arising and passing away. Even if you forget that you're the awareness, you're still the awareness, so you don't have to remember the fact all the time. If your emotions leads you to do something you consider 'bad', that's not your fault - your conditioning caused the action. If you did something good, that's not your fault either - again, the action during and following the emotion was part of your conditioning too.
Right now, as I'm writing this blog post, there is the emotion of sadness present. However, I am aware of it. I didn't bring it on, and it will pass in its own time. The decision to write this blog was not mine - the thought arose in awareness, and the desire arose with that thought, and the action happened. Some thoughts arise about the fact that I'm doing it wrong and there may be a better way - that's just a thought in awareness too. All is happening by itself - I don't have to do anything at all. I am awareness itself - whole, complete and free.
Leave a comment if you feel moved to do so :)
If you're a spiritual seeker, you probably think the ultimate goal is enlightenment. Enlightment is often seen as the end of the search - once you are enlightened, you will have no more problems or worries. You may think that enlightenment means you never get angry or sad - you never have any issues or fears. You may think enlightened people are not humans - they are almost like celestial beings. They have meditated and purified themselves so much, that they can stop their thinking and just be in total silence and stillness all the time. You may think that enlightenment is a totally different state of consciousness, way beyond your ordinary, wakeful state of mind. Enlightenment is reserved exclusively for the very few, and most of us need to keep searching for many lifetimes to get closer to the ultimate state.
I've got news for you. Enlightenment is both very easy and very ordinary. If you'll bear with me, I'll explain why. You don't need to believe anything I say, just test it out in your own experience.
Firstly, enlightenment originally means "to remove the dimness or blindness (usually figurative) from one's eyes or heart". What is this blindness in your eyes or heart? The blindness is that you are an independent physical body-mind, and that you make your own choices, and do certain actions as if you are totally separate from the environment around you. In this understanding comes a wonderful freedom and the end of constant inner conflict.
To understand this, the first step is to know that you are alive and existing. Nobody can deny their existence. You exist and you know that you exist. You don't need to even think about the fact of your existence to know that you exist. This beingness, this knowing that you are existing lies beyond thought. Right now, you can get in touch with the sense that you are alive and exist, and that sense of existence is prior to thinking. Stop your thinking for one second and do you disappear? No, of course not. You still exist. Allow yourself to be absolutely clear that this beingness, this sense of existence is always there, from the moment you were born and through all the moments of your life.
Now, that sense of beingness, which is totally ordinary and cannot be denied, is who you are. You can call it consciousness, awareness, aliveness, beingness, self. The word is not the thing. The word doesn't really matter - what matters is the recognition of your own sense of being. Understand that this ordinary, everyday sense of being is you. You are That. This is what all the scriptures and all great teachers are pointing to all the time. You are that which underlies that.
On top of this beingness, this awareness that you are, lies ALL experience. All thoughts arise and pass away in awareness. All emotions do too. All sensory perceptions arise and pass in awareness. All choices and actions arise in awareness. Anything that has ever experienced has all been experienced in awareness.
So awareness, which is what you are, and what you always have been and always will be, and are right now, is free. Awareness is space like, open, ever shining, totally effortness, free from right and wrong, good and bad, black or white. Awareness is beyond conception. And yet you are that right now. You don't need to have any kind of special experience or awakening to realise this. Ordinary, everyday awareness is what you are. If you understand this, you are free. You are enlightened, and you always were enlightened and you always will be enlightened. Everyone is enlightened, because everyone is awareness or beingness. Enlightenment is not something to get, it is realising you've always been enlightened.
If you liked this post, or have any questions, please make a comment. Thank you.
Thursday, 18 March 2010
I went to London Zoo today with the students in my class, and with a few other teachers. We saw all sorts of creatures from monkeys to lions, giraffes to gorillas, owls to flamingoes. Both the children and adults had a wonderful time.
On the coach journey to the Zoo, I was reading a book called Awakening to the Dream by Leo Hartong which I absolutely love. Leo expresses the journey of a spiritual seeker so beautifully, and all the problems with seeking. I read the chapter all about the 'me' and how the idea of a me is so strongly held to be true, that it is never questioned.
You are like a wave on the ocean. The wave arises from the ocean and goes back to being the ocean again. In fact, it's all ocean, and only the word 'wave' creates it as a separate entity to the ocean. So you are both the so called wave and the ocean.
Or, you are like the sand on the beach that has been made into a sandcastle. Although the sandcastle looks separate from the sand, the sandcastle is just sand in a particular form. When the tide comes in, the sandcastle dissolves back to becoming part of the sand on the beach once again.
Perhaps one more analogy may help. You as a separate person is like looking at a mirage. If you know that you are looking at a mirage, you don't really believe the illusion. However, you still see the mirage. In the same way, you may sense yourself as a separate entity, but deep down you know that you are not your body or mind, but are the One essence manifesting as the apparent many forms.
Let life flow.
Wednesday, 17 March 2010
Let's begin with the basics and I can show you how you are totally free right now, no matter what is happening in your life.
Firstly, understand that you are almost always searching. If you are a spiritual person, you are searching for God or Enlightenment or Bliss. If you are a materialist, you are searching for more money etc so that you can be happy. If you are a relationship person, you are searching for the perfect relationship, and if you're in a relationship you are trying to improve it so that you can be totally happy together. All this searching, no matter what you're searching for, implies that you are expecting happiness and peace and love and joy at some future point in time. One day you're gonna get it, is your expectation.
Unfortunatately and fortunately, if you are hoping to get something in the future, you are NEVER going to get it. This is because future is a concept. In reality, future doesn't exist. Nobody has ever existed in the future. The only thing that ever exists is now. You can think about the future and say, later on I'm going to have a shower, but when you're having a shower, that shower is in the present moment. Also, you can only think about the past and the future in the present moment. You are always in the now. Thoughts can only exist in the present moment, and thoughts are often about past and future. So, you can never get out of the present moment. For example, right now, try and leave the present moment? Can you? You can day dream, but that day dreaming is also in the present. So, the present moment is the only moment that exists. If you see this, then you can see that hoping for a future happiness or whatever you're searching for is just that - a hope.
In truth, what you are searching for is who you already are. You are in truth searching for yourself. What does that mean? Well, consider the question, what are you? Are you your name? Of course, you are not your name because if you were given a different name you would still be essentially the same person. Are you your body? Well, you are aware of your body, and if you are aware of something you cannot be it. For example, if you can see a chair in the room, you know you are not the chair because you are aware of it. In the same way, you are aware of your body. If you were your body, you would not be able to be aware of it, as you would be it - does that make sense. Or, consider the following - which cell in your body do you consider to be you. You are made up of trillions of cells and they are always changing and transforming - so which one are you? Are you all of them? If so, there are thousands of cells dropping off from your body every minute - does that mean you are dropping off as you walk around? That doesn't make sense, does it? Each time you breathe, the molecules of oxygen become part of you - so are you the air around you? So, perhaps you are now questioning the idea that you are the body. Yet another way of seeing this is through control - are you in control of your body? Can you stop digestion, or breathing or circulation? Are you doing all these things, or are they just happening? Can yo be something that you can't even control? You are not your body.
Are you your thoughts? Again, we can question this through control. If you are your thoughts, you should surely be able to control them completely, but can you? If I tell you, stop thinking about flying laptops for the next minute, can you do it? Are you even in control of what you'll think about next? As I write these words, I don't know what I'm going to write next. Can you see clearly that thought is happening by itself? Nobody can stop thought. Thoughts are popping up in awareness all the time, and there is nothing you can do about them really. So, if you can control them, you are not your thoughts. Another way of seeing this, is to consider that you can see your thoughts. You....can see thoughts. So, if you can see them, you are not them. There is a space between you and thoughts for you to be able to see them. You cannot be that which you observe. So, you are not your thoughts. If you look at this, it is fairly clear.
So, you are not your body or your thoughts as you can see them both. So, who or what are you? You are the observer, the witness, that which watches all experience arise and fall again. You can call this awareness, consciousness, being, witness, self, watcher, god, spirit, soul, That or whatever you want. The word is not important. I like to call it awareness. So, you are awareness. Now what is the nature of awareness, which is what you are? First of all, awareness is always shining. You are never not aware. If you're not aware of the senses around you, you're aware of thoughts. When sleeping, you're either aware of your dreams, and if there are no dreams, there is just an awareness of being - if there was no awareness at all, nobody would be able to wake you up.
As awareness, you are completely and totally free. You always have been and always will be. You thought you were your thoughts or your body or your ideas, but now you can see that you are none of those things. You are awareness - free, open, spacious, ever shining, ever witnessing, self-illuminating. And that's it - that's all there is to understand.
So, as awareness, you never have done anything, and never will. Awareness doesn't do anything, it just naturally shines. So, any action you do is something that happens by itself. Desires arise and actions happen. For example, right now, I am watching as my hands are typing this sentence - I'm not doing anything at all - it's just a happening. Additionally, breathing is happening, blinking is happening, the head is aching, and it's all just perfect just the way it is. So there is no such thing as doing. Action just arises or doesn't.
As awareness, I make no choices or decisions - they simply happen too. Decisions are based on thoughts, and thoughts arise and pass automatically. So, there is no such thing as me making a choice. In fact, you never make any choices either. Decision just happen, and a split second later, the thought arises, 'I have decided to...' but that's just a thought too. You as awareness have never, ever made a single choice. Therefore, anything you've ever done 'wrong' or 'right' was not you either. You've just done what you've done. Desires have arisen, choices have been made and actions has happened. That's it. No claim, no fame and no blame! as Leo Hartong says.
Now understand thare is no way, path, method, technique or course that leads to this because it is already happening right now! You are already awareness. You are already free. You think you are not free due to misunderstanding, but that is all. You are totally free right now. If you think you are not free, that is just another thought arising in awareness, and has no impact on the freedom that is you. You are that awareness, that aliveness and every presence shining, RIGHT NOW.
This doesn't mean everywhere you look you see a shining light. Nothing changes in a way. Everything looks the same, but you know that underneath, nothing reslly matters. Life is a game or play or dream. It's for fun. You enjoy pleasures and feel pains, but only in the moment. You eat more chocolate and may even watch more tv. You are ordinary, everyday awareness. It's nothing special at all. But it is freedom from constant improvement. It's freedom from following this or that. You can do whatever you want - there's no rules - just actions and consequences of actions. And you don't do the actions really - they just happen as they always have. You are That!
Any questions? Get in touch my friend.
Tuesday, 16 March 2010
There is always a sense of trying to improve things and make things better. I would be trying to ensure I have made time for my daily meditation and if I haven't, then I haven't looked after myself properly. There is always a sense of 'what can I do now, so that life can be lived more enjoyably'. If my mind wondered off into different thoughts, as soon as I snapped out of it, I would make an effort to be in the present moment. I had a sense I was doing things, like making decisions and walking and working. I was classifying things into good and bad all the time - a sense of 'I should be doing this' or 'I should not be doing that'. Then, I would try not to use the word 'should' as the word is supposed to be unhelpful, so I would artificially change the word to something else. I used to always be making plans about the future and how I want things to turn out.
After Awakening, although there is effort being made by this body, I am not making any effort at all, as I am Awareness. I can observe thoughts popping up in my mind, desire for this or that arising, but it isn't me doing any thinking. Right now, as I write this, I feel as if I am writing this, but at the same time, if I consider what is happening, I know that writing is happening. Thoughts are arising in my mind, and are being translated into words on a computer screen. I am not doing it at all. Awareness doesn't ever do anything - Awareness effortlessly shines on all experience. So I make no decision, no actions, do no right or wrong, light up everything I look at, I don't sleep or do I wake up. Yet, at the same time, everything looks the same and is very ordinary. I still get annoyed and irritated. I get bored and frustrated. I get angry and upset. And yet, I as in Awareness, am not touched by either of them. I know that the experience, no matter what the experience is, will pass away sooner or later anyway.
This happened to happen whilst listening to a song by John Wheeler, after listening to a talk by him. John Wheeler explains that there is a sense of being that is behind all experience. That sense of Beingness, of presence is who I am. I am not the thought 'I am'. In this presence, this beingness or awareness, everything arises. Thoughts, feelings and perceptions all arise in Awareness.
Monday, 15 March 2010
This is the invitation - to step back from your experience and notice for one moment that everything arises in Awareness. Without Awareness, no-thing exists. With Awareness arises the you and the world. You are the Awareness rather than that which Awareness observers. You always have been and always will be. Any thoughts?
Saturday, 13 March 2010
Welcome to my new blog. This is going to be a place where I share my insights and observations about the nature of identity and explore the world of advaita, nonduality, awakening and more.
Here are some of my pointers to get us started
- You are already fully awake.
- Can you deny that you are existing at the moment. That sense of Existence is pointing to Awareness which is what you are right here and now.
- Thoughts create a thinker, and the thinker separates itself from thought. You, as Awareness, are just experiencing thinking happening.